rosemary, damon, people, talk, filler words, speaking, word, stutter, audience, newsletter, speech, speaker, question, communication, important, audrey hepburn, contagious enthusiasm, univision, presentations, public speaking
Rosemary Ravinal, Damon Pistulka, Curt Anderson
Damon Pistulka 00:02
All right, everyone, it is Friday. And that means we are back again with the manufacturing ecommerce success series. I am one of your co host Damon Pistulka. And usually we have Mr. Kurt Anderson over there by himself but we’ve got Kurt with our guests today, Rosemary ravenol.
Rosemary Ravinal 00:27
And this is we’re really physically here. Physically together.
Damon Pistulka 00:31
It’s like it’s a freaking me out a little bit, but I got I’m over it and we’re ready to go. So ready to record. Take it away, man. We’re gonna be talking about mastering the art of non verbal communication. So let’s get rolling.
Curt Anderson 00:44
Hey, let’s dig right in. So first off, happy Friday, man, it just you know, it’s post Groundhog’s Day. So Damon, did you survive your Groundhog’s Day? No, that’s a big event. Big day for you. Right? I did. Okay, well, good. I’m not sure if he shot his shadow. I didn’t I missed that yesterday. I need to keep up.
Damon Pistulka 01:01
We’re having more bad weather. More bad weather.
Curt Anderson 01:05
Okay, well, hey, well, we’re at like winter doesn’t exist. So excuse us, like we’re in a public place like people might walk in. We have PacMan over our shoulder. So Alright guys, so let’s do a quick introduction. Anybody out there? Drop a note. Let us know that you’re there. We absolutely would love to invite you welcome you to connect with our dear friend. Rosemary Ravin off she is a presenting public speaking. Coach, Guru diva, you name it. She’s all the above rosemary. Riley. How are you?
Rosemary Ravinal 01:33
Happy Friday. I’m delighted to be here with you. I know that our conversations are always wonderful. And we tend to run out of time. So I’m all yours.
Curt Anderson 01:40
So hey, so Damon, repeat offender here. So Rosemary was on the program last year and she was on faces a business with you. She’s just Dynamo. I know the chat box was on fire last year when just tons of just great tips strategies. She has a amazing, incredible newsletter that comes out and I strongly encourage invite Welcome, everybody. You want to sign up for Rosemarys?
Newsletter, we’re going to talk about her the one that she came out this week. But rosemary, I want to start things off when you were on the program last year, I did not ask you this question. So we’re going to kick off things with a question. When you were a young girl, little girl growing up. Who was your hero? Who was your hero? When you were a little girl growing up?
Rosemary Ravinal 02:21
We didn’t rehearse this question. I know. Oh,
Curt Anderson 02:24
yeah. That’s awesome. You came up with a slider on that one. Who was your heroes? A little girl growing up?
Rosemary Ravinal 02:33
Oh, this is a tough question. Okay, I grew up in Cuba. And that was until I was seven and a half. Yeah. So I have to do sort of a bicultural split here. But most of my my sort of the age of Age of awareness would be like, in my early teens, like 1112. I would say Audrey Hepburn. Oh, really? Yes.
Curt Anderson 03:00
That’s a first audit. That is a first person. Excellent answer. Because
Rosemary Ravinal 03:04
I loved I loved movies. And she was always this. This elegant, but very herself. I mean, she played parts, but she was always there’s always a part of Audrey and everything she did. She always looked magnificent. And iconic. There was no one who looked anything like her. Yeah. So I would say and this I don’t know where I dug it out from but I think it’s a real sincere answer, because I hadn’t given it for but I think that those were the moment like non Yeah, you don’t plant it. It just comes out spontaneously. That’s my final answer.
Curt Anderson 03:37
Audrey Hepburn. As you know, my first thought is On Golden Pond. I don’t know if anybody remembers that one, I think was an Oscar winner. So that was a phenomenal movie. So I hate that was a great answer. David, that was the first time that Audrey Hepburn on the program. And
Rosemary Ravinal 03:51
that that was really fun to Jane Fonda and your father.
Curt Anderson 03:55
Yep. And wasn’t she the wife and that was Audrey Hepburn.
Rosemary Ravinal 03:59
I don’t think so. She was looking dude, she the wife. I don’t think she was in it.
Curt Anderson 04:07
Alright, well, I have to do a Google search to check that out. Alright, so we’ll let’s keep moving forward. So as we dig into the so we’re going to talk about how to how to present your presenting skills and also like nonverbal skills. So you know, rosemary, let’s just go right there. Let’s just dig in and start talking. Let’s start thinking about like some of the tips strategies that you present to your clients and how you can communicate better and non language. Well,
Rosemary Ravinal 04:33
because, you know, we, we speak before we speak, we speak before we speak, let that sink
Curt Anderson 04:40
How about that one? Damon, we speak before
Rosemary Ravinal 04:43
we send a word we’re speaking because everything about us. Everything about us says something about what we are what we stand for. And we are walking grants, so we have to be really conscious what I call conscious communication. Yeah, what we say with our word It needs to be obviously impeccable and very thoughtful.
But the way we show up the way we show up in this rectangle, the way we show up in the meeting, the way we interact with other human beings, all of that sends signals. And I call them charisma signals, which were the they telegraph out who we are. And it’s a lot of it is basic respect, in terms of what we’re taught as children, you know, to, to listen to not not speak out of turn, to respect elders.
And the same, the same kind of lessons in life can be applied to the fundamentals of speaking before we speak. This, the most example that I could give is, November, we talked about tilting and nodding of the head. Very simple signals, such as you’re tilting your head, when you’re listening gives the signal that you are paying attention, that you are being considerate that you are interested in what’s being said.
And this is a very important signal in in video conferencing, because obviously, we’re in a sterile environment, we’re only dealing with two senses, right sight and sound. But to have that extra accent of someone tilting the head to say, I hear you I’m it’s an empathetic gesture. Similarly, the nodding, which we know is usually a sign of agreement doesn’t have to be agreement. It just also means I’m listening. I’m with you. I’m following you. And those are two very political micro gestures that have tremendous power.
Damon Pistulka 06:43
I’ve got a question that I’m I’m ready for this one today occurred. This is like, like, you know, usually I say like four things in the whole thing. But one of my habits and I wonder if this looks bad is because when I’m listening to somebody, I tend to get like this once in a while I get my face, like, you know, two inches from my camera, because I’m trying I’m trying to listen intently.
On video, is that freaky? Or is that? I mean, is it okay? Because I because then I go, then I look at it, and I go, Oh, man, okay, you know, and I back off like that. But because videos a little different, but I don’t know if that’s, that’s wrong. Or I just liked that. I just liked to listen.
Rosemary Ravinal 07:25
It doesn’t look good. Damon, it doesn’t look good. Because everything on on camera is magnified. Yeah, right. In the physical space, there’s much first of all, there’s more distance between us. Right, depending on the culture that you’re in, right, sometimes you have to be farther distance. In some others, like Latin cultures, you can be a little closer.
But on video, it looks like you’re imposing like you’re you’re trying to take over. It’s a wonderful gesture to use. When I want to make a really important point, I might come close to the webcam. Remember to drink your milk, and brush your teeth. So it’s, it’s those moments where we want to put emphasis underscore highlight when we can use that gesture, but to listen, I would say it’s not your best choice. What have you been told that people giving you feedback?
Damon Pistulka 08:23
No, no, I just I haven’t gotten feedback on before but I catch myself I catch myself like this on the screen and I’m like, Oh, God, I said That’s rude. You know.
Curt Anderson 08:32
I do the same thing, Damon. So. Alright, so let’s get let’s let’s keep rolling with a sense more tips. But I want to I want to I want to I want to dig into Rosemary here for a second on her background. Okay. Yeah, as I mentioned, so we’re here with rosemary wrapping up, boy, do yourself a favor. You actually want to connect with Rosen, rosemary on LinkedIn, you want to follow her newsletter. Now she has this illustrious, amazing, incredible career, I believe MSNBC is so
Rosemary Ravinal 08:57
I was I was a contributor for MSNBC during its first two years. Yeah. And that was a remarkable experience. I was I was working very actively, I was really known as a Hispanic communicator. And I was their first official Latina. And that was a not only a great opportunity as a communicator, but it also allowed me to voice different viewpoints based on how the news was impacting the Hispanic community.
Curt Anderson 09:28
So Damon, Pioneer smashing ceilings just you know, I mean, really a blessing to for us to spend time with rosemary and just you know, what she’s gone through, you know, work with numerous corporate I know, we’ve talked last time like Avon, at&t just kind of a who’s who list of clients that she’s worked with. Now, we were talking before we went live you have a great story, you know, so all the scrape corporate Univision right? Got that correct? Yes. And she, she became an entrepreneur right before COVID Three years ago.
So I love for you to share a little bit so you know, we have folks that come in a program that either marketers, they worked for different companies, and they’re like, You know what, at some point in time, I wouldn’t mind dipping my toe in entrepreneurship. So three years ago, you know, we’ve had this long career, what was that, like?
Rosemary Ravinal 10:15
Most of my career was spent either being the spokesperson for a company, I hosted, as you mentioned, MSNBC, I hosted some public affairs shows in New York and did a lot of radio was willing produced radio. And but most of my the bulk of my years as a professional have been spent working as a corporate communications leader and companies like AT and T and Avon, and at History Channel, and ended up being an adviser to companies like Toyota, and worked for large agencies as well.
So but I was always doing the bidding for someone else. The last role that I’m very grateful to have held I was VP of political relations for Univision, which is the largest Hispanic entertainment company in the world.
Now, it’s known as Bella visa, Univision because they, they merged. But when my term expired there, I didn’t want to go back to doing more of the same, I felt it was time to actually use my own voice to find my own voice to help other people find theirs. And I had been collecting over the years, tons of books and video and all kinds of I gone to training courses about effective communication.
And but not taking it really seriously, I would use that information to teach my clients, my in house clients and to help others in my organization. But I always was a little bashful about going up on my own and doing it as a public speaking coach. But then I said, you know, it was mid 2019. This is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, I already had a mass, tremendous amount of reference material, I was ready.
So I started, I started coaching individuals, and keynoters, I was working with a speaker’s bureau. And then of course, everything changed in March of 2020. So it was a, there’s no turning back. Now, because I’m three years in and loving what I’m doing. And finding that no matter how much someone knows, there’s always something you can of love. And even the most experienced speakers, CEOs, shares of boards need that extra help.
And because they’re they can’t be their own critic, you have to have another point of view, and another set of eyes and ears to give you feedback, because what they do is high stakes. Now we can it can change the stock price, right? We can you can can either help you retain employees or lose them. Right? It can it can ruin your reputation, and it can cost you your own career in that company. So there’s a lot of stick every time we speak.
Curt Anderson 12:49
Oh my god. Alright, a few things I want to uncover. So find my you know, Rosemary finds her voice to help others kind of exploit theirs, right? And I’ll tell you, you know, what you do when you think about it, you know, you can even be a little bit I don’t know how you feel about this, like you can almost be you know, a little bit not the sharpest tool in the shed, if you will, right. But you command yourself as a presence and just come across authoritative. And it just it just you give people just that confidence. You know? i Oh, my gosh, this is so good. I want to cover you have a quote from Warren Buffett, do you have? Yes,
Rosemary Ravinal 13:25
yes, I have. I have let me paraphrase. He says that you can have the greatest brain power Yeah, in the world. And if you don’t know how to transmit it, then it’s useless. And the transmission is communication. Right? Right. So if you can’t get it from your head, through your mouth, or, or be it let’s not exclude other forms of communication, like writing, or photography, or other arts forms, if you can’t transmit it to other human beings, then it’s just, it’s just stuck there. It doesn’t serve anyone. Right. So, you know, he sees that as a fundamental trait of leaders.
Curt Anderson 14:04
Right. And I think I think it’s more about you know, if you can, it takes a lifetime to earn trust, it can take a millisecond to, like destroy trust, you know, when you think of Warren Buffett’s career when you know, he resurrected, resurrected the stock market, what you know, back in the day, you know, when, you know, when it was crashing, and what have you but, you know, so when you think about like, the benefits that you can have by just commanding that presence and like even you know,
like, we’re when we’re talking to our manufacturers are, I think, like valance here today, we’ve got Dan buyer, so when you the manufacturers that are out there, like hey, we met you know, I’m really not doing my public speaking, but boy, when you get a brand new RFQ when somebody drops a note and says, you know, hey, I’m gonna send you a drawing, I have an RFP, and you know, get that company on a zoom as soon as possible.
And so rosemary, let’s start going into I looked at like you she had a phenomenal newsletter, and I’m telling you like, I read her newsletter religiously. Every time it comes out. It’s one that hits My inbox I’m like, I need to stop focus Rosemary speaking and I need to this is like learning time.
You had a great newsletter this week and if I have it correctly was like nine myths of so we’re gonna bust some presentation. So Damon we’re gonna do a little pop quiz dude, I know you like you’re not you guys for everybody out there Damien’s not 100% today got you know, thank you for being with us. Today. Damon, you’re a trooper, but we’re gonna do a little quiz. How about that? Let’s do a little. We’re gonna do a little true and false quiz today. And she has some hysterical I love. I love the first one. Let’s go. Can we get into the first one?
Rosemary Ravinal 15:33
The first one this is a tour for true or false is the answer. 1042 Fox is the answer. Yep. Now the question is, it is a good idea to visualize your audience naked in order to cure your fear of public speaking.
Curt Anderson 15:54
Damon, is that true or false? So if you’re standing in front of a crowded room, a couple 100 people and you’re just feeling or butterflies are just flying. And you have a great night about butterflies to
Damon Pistulka 16:04
I would say false. I’ve never tried to do that. And I just think it’s weird in my mind.
Curt Anderson 16:11
Bravo, right answer Intel and tell them why.
Rosemary Ravinal 16:14
Yes, it is. It’s it’s this sort of Axiom that’s that’s come about, and maybe from don’t maybe last century or
Curt Anderson 16:25
origin probably guys some like goofy guys. I’m sure. They’re right, Damon.
Rosemary Ravinal 16:31
Stuck, right. It became sort of like the thing about, oh, envision everybody, like in different states of disrobing, so that you feel like you are more powerful, more important than they are, you’re making them vulnerable. What a horrible thing to do to your audience. First, it is you said this preposterous is ridiculous statement. Second, it’s disrespectful to your audience. Yeah, you are there to benefit them. Listen to me, most people think that you’re that we speak in public to benefit ourselves just sort of, you know, to polish our ego, right?
No. And that’s what happens very often why people fail, when they speak, they’re thinking about themselves. You’re not the audience, the people who are listening to you or the audience. So if you’re not respecting them, by seeing them as whole people, they’re seated, you know, eager to hear what you have to say. And and the ones who will determine if you succeed or you fail. So how are you going to envision them naked? That’s wrong. So scratch that one off, let’s let’s just kill kill that, that myth.
Curt Anderson 17:37
I’m glad you know what, we’re making official Damon here. February 3 2023. It is note that that’s no longer a tactic as a public speaker. Yes, go that route. Right. So we’re getting that out? Which sure another one?
Rosemary Ravinal 17:51
Sure. Another one is that if you eliminate all the filler words, all the you know, the fluffy, unnecessary the things that we hear every day in common speech, we do even hear them when there’s media interviews, right? The arms and they are in this like, and you know, and I mean, it’s these are these are almost like a virus they they just permeate our speech. Everywhere.
You see it sometimes more often a certain generations than others. Well, those filler words are sometimes called the word whiskers, whiskers. I don’t know who coined that. But what cute way to remember them. Many people ask me well, I want to when we start doing the initial intake for a coaching session, I want to eliminate my filler words. And okay, so is it are people who don’t use filler words at all? Are they better speakers than those who do this trick question, Damon?
Curt Anderson 18:52
Oh, we’re gonna play the Jeopardy music Damon?
Damon Pistulka 18:56
Well, I don’t know completely. eliminating them. Probably makes your makes your makes your speech sound kind of funny. But, you know, if I’m going um, I mean, that gets that gets me. I purposely used to listen to the live videos and and, and that’s one of my words is and is you is take the time to put the pauses in rather than fill it with filler words.
Rosemary Ravinal 19:27
You’re an advanced speaker. Yes. So it is it is false. It is. There’s a so called ratio of how many filler words a professional presenter will use and it’s typically one or two every minute.
But that shouldn’t be the Hallmark because it’s what you’re communicating the substance of what you have to share that matters. Of course, you don’t want to have someone saying you know every other sentence because that’s distracting, but a few filler words and you said you know earlier You’re answering me, Damon. Maybe people are particularly hyper focused because there’s been such a lot of talk about, you know, filler words show that you’re not smart and filler words show that you’re not focused.
Filler words make you an amateur. So this has to be a balance, right? normal speech, you do use some filler words. And sometimes you look at words that you repeat. And words for example, sometimes they use the word right after I say something, right? And if you if you do that, if I do that very too many times it starts to become a filler word filmmaker. So you got the answer right Damon, he’s, he’s, he’s doing to do zero.
Curt Anderson 20:42
Dude, you’re under your hate to
Damon Pistulka 20:44
an old man. And I didn’t even study you didn’t
Curt Anderson 20:47
even study so let’s let’s dig into another what’s what’s what’s one that might cut let’s get a stumper for David. Do you have like a really good mix that might kind of throw him off with
Rosemary Ravinal 20:57
yes okay. This is one from the newsletter. Good speakers are born they’re not made false he’s too good.
Curt Anderson 21:14
Dropped mic brother man your dude you’re on you’re on fire Damon, you are on fire.
Damon Pistulka 21:19
With me. It’s like leaders, right? Good leaders aren’t born. They’re they’re they’re developed and speaking is is like any other skill like working out, I think anyways, essential
Rosemary Ravinal 21:28
to leadership. It is essential leadership. And we’re seeing that more often now. Where we have a lot of data from Gartner and the Center for Leadership. Numerous studies from Harvard Business Review is published several, our friend Dorries also talked about Dorie Clark talked about the importance of, of good communication as a as one of the top traits that are sought in future C suite.
So if there is a recruitment campaign for a senior senior position in a company, the soft skills are now getting more weight and more importance than the technical skills. So it’s, it’s fundamental to managerial ability. So it’s it surpasses a lot of the other resume qualifications. To answer the question.
Yes, if speakers are not born, they’re made is parallel to leadership. But what’s important is when people say, Oh, he was born with the gift of gab, oh, he’s, uh, he can you can talk up a storm, you know, he can he can start talking to a stranger, and you know, and engage in 30 seconds. Okay, that may be good for some things. But what’s the substance that you’re communicating, and just just gathering, just chatting for the sake of talking is not necessarily what we seek in business.
So yes, some people maybe have more of a, what we call extroverted qualities, and feel more comfortable among a lot of people and have less of a filter between themselves and others. But it really has to be learned. And it’s the kind of thing you do with practice with good counsel with good coaching, with understanding of the dynamic of how you communicate is is two way and you’re there to serve your audience, not the other way around.
Curt Anderson 23:23
So let’s go let’s go here. Daymond, I’m picturing you know, you’ve shared your background, your history, great career and manufacturing, and you’ve had something like tough moments, tough occasions, where you have to address the crowd. Okay, so then I’m going off script.
So this is just as you’re talking, you know, like, say, you have See, you’re delivering bad news. And you know, you’re a daemon you’ve been there, right, we’re, you know, like we it’s coming down on done General Manager or what have you, like, we don’t we just it is what it is, we don’t have good news, or do you have any tips, suggestions for, you know, manufacturer that’s out there, and maybe some of that has occurred, whether an unfortunate thing, maybe it’s business wise, or whatever, you know,
Rosemary Ravinal 24:07
well, that that speaks to more of a crisis communication approach, like, which I’ve also done many times in my career, but the spokesperson, the leader, the individual who’s delivering the news should be at the highest level possible to begin with, right? Who is where the buck stops?
And it should always include what’s in it for the audience. What is the impact on the people sitting in front of you, you might talk about initiatives and about expansion and about market fluctuation and all these things, but what people really want to hear about is what’s going to happen to my family to me like it be able to put food on my table, what is my job security, so you have to address those points with empathy, with empathy and with charismatic signals.
Say, you know, what I talked about earlier about the tilting of the head about I’m using a smile periodically to welcome everyone to do signal again, I use the word telegraph because you’re not using words or sounds, but you’re letting them know that this is there. We’re all in this together. That this is not me you are management and employees.
And that this is something that collectively, we all have a stake in. So empathetic communication has to do a lot with choice of words. And that’s a whole other discussion for another day. But there is a lot that is really incumbent on that individual delivering the news, the bad news that can be done by nature of that awareness of how you’re coming across, maybe not standing at a podium, maybe sitting down at the same level as everybody else.
So you’re one of them. Right? Not having a script, but maybe having just a few bullet point notes coming from the heart. Exactly. Exactly. You can use all the filler words you want, because it’s the it’s the substance and the outcome. What is the effect? What is the transformation that you have achieved? And the people you’re talking to? Yeah.
Curt Anderson 26:11
Oh my gosh, this is so good. Okay, so I went, you know, Daymond I tried to be Mr. Hafele. Mr. Positive, I went like, okay, hey, if there’s bad news, so let’s flip the script. Okay. somebody’s out there. Like, you know, I want to step up my game on my man rosemary, I’m totally digging this.
I’m, I’m enjoying what you’re saying. I want to get more intentional, to be a better communicator, more positive. I want to I want to, I want to have that contagious enthusiasm, without being you know, too over the top. But how do you how do you really kind of like for someone that’s maybe on the introverted side? How can you come into like a positivity and a contagious enthusiasm, contagious enthusiasm to kind of stuff up there speaking gig?
Rosemary Ravinal 26:52
That could be a whole other. We’re gonna have her back for? Yeah. It starts with let me let me back up using the analogy. We’ve got companies. Yeah, we’re in a hotel. Yeah. The we that’s a doozy. So that’s it. Yeah. If we had a pill that I could give you, that made you a better speaker, thank you easy, but there’s no magic pill. Yeah, it’s more like the weights that you use in a gym. You got to keep using them, you have to sizing your speaker muscle. So it’s not like Oh, give me one coaching session, and I’ll be transformed.
No, you have to continue to practice it. I have to practice it. professional speakers have to practice and professional speakers speak to other professional speakers to get the feedback as to whether there be they’re doing it correctly or not given the audience that they’re intending to talk to. So it’s not the pill. There’s no magic pill. And I forgot the question you asked. Yeah,
Curt Anderson 28:01
yeah, no, this is like that enthusiasm.
Rosemary Ravinal 28:05
Yes. introverted. Yeah. I have another simple answer. I love what you’re talking about. Yeah. And loved the audience. Love the audience. So often we talk as if we have to write we will load up the talk with big words. And we forget that we have to actually believe in what we’re saying. I’ve got to love what I’m talking about. Because that transmits. If I’m not into it, if I’m not feeling it, it’s like it’s not gonna be believable. So credibility, credibility, clarity, consistently achieved, are so important. And you have to do this time and time and time again, not just put on an act for one situation.
So I love what you’re talking about. Love your audience love being there. It’s it’s it is contagious. Totally contagious. Now, introverts. There’s another myth about them. Barak Obama is an introvert. Elon Musk is an introvert Warren Buffett is an introvert, but they’re among the most quoted respected speakers I don’t know about Elon these days. Yeah. But the the point is that you work through it because it’s not about the fear of being in front of an audience.
It’s where you recharge your battery. Could you go to develop ideas to formulate your your your words, your universe, just just find your inspiration? Where’s your muse? Where’s your muse? And sometimes the Muse is in being in a quiet space meditating, taking a walk in nature, swimming, doing some sport, but being by yourself perhaps, but others just thrive on the action of being always around people and that’s fine too.
Then there is the you know, the middle ground, you know, get the quasi right you know, the the In this there’s a term, multi, multi word extrovert. I’m forgetting the word this one. Is this a term for the one in the middle, we’ll use battle. Yeah. Okay. And that’s, that’s fine too, because you may be you may be situational, right? Where you find that you can perform better if you if you go to a quiet space.
So introversion isn’t always and this does a spectrum of introversion and extraversion. So you can be mildly introverted and aware, for example, in my case, I actually work in both both spheres. But I like that quiet time. But I also thrive in front of an audience. I am so happy that now I’m getting to talk to people live. Yeah. In person because that that that dynamic is to me totally energized.
Curt Anderson 30:50
Yeah, I love it. Yeah. Man, this is so good. So I’m Rosemary, and we’ve been longtime friends. And so this is great. Like, we finally get together in person. And so this is a gift. And we were talking about a quote earlier from, you’re talking about Tony Robbins. Yes. And David, I just wanted to share real quick. So I was I’m probably gonna butcher the story, but I just want to emphasize what you just said, Here, rosemary, just so powerful. I was listening to a podcast was Tony Robbins, and I believe that, you know, Daymond, we listened to Ed my lat.
And he was on Edmond last podcast, and I think was just last week or a couple weeks ago. And he shared a story that younger man, he was in his 20s. And if I’m probably gonna butcher this, he was going to his class reunion. And he was like, all wound up and like, you know, there was gonna be some bolt, you know, like, oh, revisit bullies or like bad memories from when he was in high school.
And now, you know, and it’s, you know, even in his 20s Tony Robbins is already, you know, kind of on his way for success. And he was on his way, and he called his mom and said, Hey, I’m gonna my reunion, and you know, I’m kind of, you know, flustered are this, that and she goes, What’s your problem, she’s like, it’s not about you. Like, just go there.
And like, just love them. Like, you don’t need to be interesting, be interested in arrested. And like, if I hope I had that close, but like, it was just so powerful. And it just emphasizes what you just said, like, you know, it can be it doesn’t matter if it’s an audience of one audience of 10 audience of 100 When you come in, and you just come in with that enthusiasm to just love the audience. And like you said, Love, your topic, love what you’re talking, man, it just, it’s just a game changer. So this is
Rosemary Ravinal 32:25
that applies to manufacturing and E commerce with every field, every field, I mean, this is sort of a universal law. Tony has a quote, which is a bit of a generality, but the quality of your life is equal to the quality of your communication. And if you let that sink in, and you say what the quality of your life is, is the quality of your communication. He uses it also as an umbrella concept to talk about the way we talk to ourselves, the way we talk to our loved ones the way we talk to people external to words in your to our, our work, Rob.
Every every one we talk to you, but it also starts with oneself that will be that self talk. But yes, communication is everything. And it is it shows up in in so many places that wise people, you know, wisdom teachers are always telling us about communication. And we take we don’t take it very seriously. Because another thing that we do, and this is a this is a maybe another Intuit to enforce question for you, Damon. Oh, you’re ready. Great presentations have to have dazzling visuals.
Damon Pistulka 33:41
Curt Anderson 33:45
dude, you’re for it all, like your, for your Damon’s for note today.
Damon Pistulka 33:49
Actually, I really feel the best presentations are from people that know the subject well enough that if you could put up if you have to put up slides better if you can explain it without slides, if you need a visual or to just to spark the thought that that’s I mean, because when you see somebody doing a presentation is bullet point after bullet point after bullet point, you just want to, you know, you want to throw up and run out of the room crying.
That’s my PowerPoint, right? Yeah, yeah. But it really is a passionate speaker that knows what they’re talking about that can really help you what you said earlier love the audience and what you’re talking about when you feel that from the speaker, that’s doesn’t matter if they’ve got visuals. Yes.
Rosemary Ravinal 34:33
And it but it is so prevalent. That and people I coach come to me with these 500 words on a PowerPoint slide. I’m exaggerating, but it feels that way. And it could just as well be 500 Because you can’t read them anyway. And they are somehow I don’t know where this is in in grad school. MBA programs. I don’t know who’s teaching Right, right, but they have this false notion that they have to have all this gunk in a slide in order for them to read it for them to be successful in a presentation.
And I’m trying to flip, you know, the whole the whole concept over and it’s very difficult for them to let go to just really prepare themselves to know the topic. And I like to use the analogy of you as the presenter or the lead singer. And this ledger you bet there’s, there’s a backup, there’s going to going to do what do what do What are you doing the whole you know, song, right.
And if you look at it that way, you know, then you could still sing the song without the backup singers. And in that’s something you will need to work towards, because there may be situations particularly in sales, where you’re going someplace and you don’t control all of the aspects of like today like we don’t know if somebody’s going to be coming in the door and just to be ready to do it without slides.
You know, just talk it through and and don’t be so dependent on your dazzling presentations. People spend fortunes on the your audio visual will be a keynote PowerPoint, you know Prezi or whatever you use, and it’s important to have great visuals if you’re going to have the Midas will have them well designed, but in that design process make it as economical as possible to just give you that punch that it may be held helps you bridge into your next idea
Curt Anderson 36:36
you know and so the thing, Damon, I think we It looks like the champ is gone. We got Christina, the vows here today, Diane so guys, happy Friday,
Damon Pistulka 36:44
Max the top air Yeah, man.
Curt Anderson 36:47
Yeah. And, boy, do yourselves a favor, connect here with rosemary Ravenel just in, you know, Damon this week, you know, hey, Whitney, you know, depending on when anybody’s catching us, but Tom Brady retired once again, right, and, you know, greatest. Hey, Paul, thanks for joining us today. And, you know, greatest football player, you know, almost unarguably, right. It’s played the game. And when you think about a guy like Tom Brady, he had a head coach, he had an offensive coordinator.
He had a quarterbacks coach, he had impact with the running backs coach, he was part of the offensive line, you know, he had an offensive line coach, he had a tight ends coach hit a wide receiver coach, like, Why does Tom Brady need eight different coaches? You know what I mean? You know, golfers, you know, you know, Tiger Woods, I know, I’m probably date myself there, you know, we’re, you know, like, they have multiple coaches.
So the thing is, you know, like, I’m gonna say like, Well, wait a minute, I’m, you know, I’m this age, why do I need a coach to help me communicate? Well, if you want to be in a position of leadership in like, you know, our friend, Chris Harrington is amazing communicator, CEO, Gen Alpha technologies, you know, at any level that you’re at, it’s just so important to like, really step up your communication game, I’m going to throw another little curveball at you. So I hopefully you’re not uncomfortable this.
So we’re part of the group together, I have the honor privilege. We’re in this little wonder wonderful mastermind, I get to meet with rosemary every two weeks. And this is today’s our first time meeting each other in person and just such a religious person. This is great. And so you should, you know, big thing. We’re still newish into 2023. And everybody has their word of the year.
And Daymond we’ve been talking about a couple of different things, right? How do you become courageously uncomfortable? How do you become courageously comfortable? Get out of your comfort zone? And we’ve talked about we talk all the time about radical gratitude, right? How can you be just like just a deep, radical gratitude, you shared a really powerful word. Are you comfortable sharing your Word of the Year? Remember, I think we talked a few weeks ago about about your work
Rosemary Ravinal 38:53
Curt Anderson 38:55
resiliency for to 2023 Right.
Rosemary Ravinal 38:58
Now, there was initially another word that now I’m forgetting what it was because I you again, you caught me off guard. But that was my word for last year of resilience. And it was it was more it was more it was more profound and resilience. It was speaking my truth,
Curt Anderson 39:15
speaking her truth. And she I was very excited about that a little bit and I will the word will come to us. But you were what you shared was just very powerful, very inspiring about like how you’re trying to attack you’re coming into 2023 with just a vigor. Can you just talk a little bit about like your goals.
Rosemary Ravinal 39:32
But if the speaking the truth, is it those who aren’t the exact words, but it was the idea being doing what I love and staying with on course with the work I’m doing an executive speaker coaching and also became the guest speaker, which is something that even though I’ve done live television and hosted and run press conferences and done tons of media interviews, I want to speak for myself, I want to speak in my own voice, I want to tell my stories.
And that’s what I introduced this year. It’s very comfortable for me to be behind the scenes to get you ready to deliver that great speech. Right? Right. And then bask in your glow of success. But I want to be I want to also do the talking and addressing the audience. And both doing both, I think is really going to enrich my my life. Because I’m doing both it’s, it’s in there, I have to take you have the courage to come out with my signature speech, which is about stuttering. Because I was a stutterer for most of my life, can you believe
Curt Anderson 40:43
that? Is like is that astounding? Like,
Rosemary Ravinal 40:48
and it’s the title of the talk in the in development is from terror to treasure, treasure, Oh, I lost my stutter and found my voice, which is a metaphor. And stuttering is a metaphor for what holds us back. Whatever it may be for every individual. And I was a stutterer really badly in my teen years, it continued into college, into my early 30s. And I lost it by sheer willpower, because voice therapy, and especialista. And stuttering never really helped. The microphone helped me with talking, doing radio in college speak into a microphone because it was it was like death, life or death. I had to do it correctly.
And there was another layer of, of need of commitment of terror, terror. Yeah, I had to do it right. So I subsequently did a lot of vocal coaching and found that by taking certain breaths into words, that tripped me sounds to trick me how to avoid blocks in in speech, and clear enunciation. sounding out every vowel, every every every, every part of a word, helped me get through it, there was a it’s, it’s the way many people have done it. Yet stuttering is something that affects close to 2% of the population on Earth.
And it’s something that we need to embrace that people with a stutter are our neighbors or friends, they’re our mentors or teachers. They are vital members of the community, they have a different speech pattern. That’s all.
Curt Anderson 42:45
I mean, is that that’s why that’s why we went there, David, that was just how inspiring and so thing is, how does that look how that ties in so perfectly with being courageously uncomfortable. Just coming in and just like stepping out of your comfort zone just coming in, you know, again, like that, that resiliency, that just relentless belief in yourself. And you know, and I just appreciate you sharing that with us.
And I felt like my I recognize like, what a how often I am speaking when I’m like what Rosemary like she’s so articulate. It’s such a gifted, great word tater, right, just such a great communicator. And then when I found out she was like, oh, yeah, I was a stutter. I’m like, what were they when, like, when did this happen? And like to overcome that. It’s just like, I can’t understate like, what a massive accomplishment that is. So you know, round of applause to you,
Rosemary Ravinal 43:36
thank you. But let me clarify something. Once the stutter always a stutter is always there. And there’s an I have to say, there. Sometimes when I’m in front of a big audience, or doing a large webinar, I do feel that, that that change coming back, it doesn’t go away. But you’ve learned to deal with it. You know, it’s there are many people who are covert cutters who know how to get around and they know how to avoid certain words. And or take deep breaths into something or write chords into very into their syllables. Right. But you didn’t never really goes away. Right. So
Curt Anderson 44:13
and I think, I think, Dana, I don’t know what you think about this, but just, you know, like, when you think about, like, oh, you know, the imposter syndrome, or I’m not, I’m not this, you know, I’m not tall enough, good enough, big enough, small enough, whatever your whatever your What if thing is right. But you just, you know, you just take it on, you’re like, This is not going to stop me.
This is not going to prevent me. I’m not going to, you know, not pursue being a gifted speaker, you know, when the top speaking coaches on the circuit because of this ailment, which, like if you think about right, kind of like me being a barber, right?
Damon Pistulka 44:49
Being a barber.
Curt Anderson 44:52
Good job. So. So let’s go here. Any other minutes that we want to talk about on your
Rosemary Ravinal 44:59
business? A couple more. One of them is that professional speakers are not afraid. They’ve lost their fear of speaking. True or False.
Damon Pistulka 45:11
Oh, that’s false. That’s false.
Curt Anderson 45:15
Did he get it? Yes.
Damon Pistulka 45:17
I mean, there they are. They’re lying. They’re lying. They’re not finding.
Curt Anderson 45:23
What do they say? 90% of people are terrified of public speaking the other 10 are liars. Yeah, they’re lying like that
Rosemary Ravinal 45:31
was supposedly coined by by Mark Twain was a Mark Twain. anybody tells you
Curt Anderson 45:35
that they don’t feel probably speaking. Right? Yeah, 90% or the other 10 are liars.
Rosemary Ravinal 45:41
And it came from Mark Twain, who in his lifetime was one of the foremost orders right on Earth, right. And it’s curious because it’s about dealing with the fear, you need a certain amount of fear, a certain amount of anxiety, excitement, I tell my clients journey. Just embrace the word nervous. Turn that nervousness into excitement, right? So when you say to me, I’m nervous. Now you’re excited, right?
Because you are you have those butterflies going on in your stomach and you have like, like a tingling sensation in your body. And there may be things like dry now that there may be shaking of hands, or maybe things that are visible to other people. But generally, you can control those controls.
For example, if your hands are shaking, hold on to something, hold on to the lectern, hold on to your paper, hold on one paper enough is a plain paper flip onto the microphone with both hands. But professional speakers deal with it. And it’s important. It’s almost like having a coffee rush, like, you know, caffeine rush. And what does it do a project into better performance? And that happens with athletes as well. My dog pumped up. What is Tony Robbins do with how he talks? He goes on stage? Have you seen his his Netflix? Yeah, he
Curt Anderson 46:59
jumps up and down on a trampoline. Yeah.
Rosemary Ravinal 47:02
He goes nuts. You know, he’s told in his bodies all pumped up. And then when he goes out there he’s drawing is similar. And he’s trying to to, to sort of bring it on steroids. But generally, that enhances what you do on front of other people.
Curt Anderson 47:19
Right? Okay. I’ve been I’ve lost track of time comments, guys. Yeah. Turns into comments here.
Damon Pistulka 47:26
And he, when he’s talking about the ambivert, we were trying to figure out one of the
Curt Anderson 47:32
things down in Houston. Thank you. Dina, expiring rosemary. Thank you, Chris. I’d love for you to to connect some time. Yeah. And Diane’s here today. So we’ll start winding down. I guess we’re I think we’re public speaking I shake that
Damon Pistulka 47:47
thing shakes. And that’s, you know, that’s me, I still to this day, you know, and I’m, I’m not a public speaker in any sense of the word. When you have to speak to 150 people in a manufacturing setting, trying to you know, good bad news indifferent. Right? You know, you do have those butterflies you do, it makes your stomach turn the first few times. And for me, the thing that I’ve always used is said, first of all, if you see me shaking, it’s because I’m nervous out here. Yeah, I get it right out on the table. I know, like,
Rosemary Ravinal 48:22
people will relate to that. Because yeah, right.
Damon Pistulka 48:25
Yeah. Because it’s like, there’s no, there’s no hide it with me,
Curt Anderson 48:29
right? It’s like, well, you know, when the thing is, is, you know, we we are blessed with introverts that come on our show, and just this past Monday, five days ago, we had somebody from one of the MEPs write dear friend and totally out of her comfort zone when I invited her on the show, like Jade like that look of terror, you know? Yes. Like, and she, you know, got courageously uncomfortable came on the program. And what did she tell us before she went live? She’s like, Yeah, I think I’m gonna throw up. Yeah, yeah. And you know, how many lives have you you know, you’ve done 400.
So I mean, it’s, you know, now it’s like, second nature to you. But for other people who haven’t done it before, like this is it can be nerve racking that can be overwhelming, intimidating. And so again, like getting out of that comfort zone. And so, you know, we just, we’re all in this together. You know, think about like a fear or something that you’re trying to overcome. And what a great opportunity, a great time. Right here right now to like, let’s let’s take that fear of radon and bust through it.
Rosemary Ravinal 49:29
Substitute the word nervous. We’re excited. Yeah, I’m excited. Yes. And let me just say one thing about what we’re doing here yeah, we’re on an A virtual, this is not going to go away. Yeah, people thought early this year that oh, well last year, mostly. Oh, no, we don’t have to worry about video conferencing anymore. I don’t have to put put my camera on anymore. They were bored done with this.
No, this is an integral part of the way we do business today. There’s a hybrid thing some people will choose to to come on on on on a call and video call of this will prefer to be in person, some people will still remain in remote and they have to be, you know, brought into the conference room we have to learn how to deal with both audiences, those who are in front of you and those who are at home. Where do you look? How do you make everybody feel included and important? And so that’s those are new skills that we have to step up and learn.
Curt Anderson 50:22
Absolutely. So and I’ll tell you firsthand, have just having, you know, the privilege of being part of rosemary circle and her world and her energy. You know, I feel I’ve I’ve definitely, I have a long way to go. So anything that you find positive is thanks to Rosemary, coach, rosemary, anything negative, I’m still working on that’s all on me. But you know, if you’re out there and you’re like, boy, I’d really like to step up my game. You really you just the authentic, authentic, genuine, kind, gracious, humble.
Everything that you can think of, is our dear friend, Rosemary. And she is just an absolute Rockstar expert at this and just, you know, the the tips and the strategies and again, back to like my Tom Brady analogy, why on earth why Why does Tom Brady need eight different coaches? You know, like, why do I need to? Why do I need a coach on how to communicate better? It’s like, boy, just how much further that you can take yourself?
Rosemary Ravinal 51:15
To say something to that. Tom Brady’s announcement of his retirement wasn’t done at a press conference. Yeah, he just did it on his mobile phone. I don’t know whose Instagram or to talk. But he just spoke from his heart. And that I think was the most elegant, really amused gracious, consistent with his his style his that’s what he’s known for. And I thought that was so fitting. It was clear that
Curt Anderson 51:41
way. I agree. 100%. So let’s start winding down. And oh, everybody’s got a busy Friday coming into the Great weekend here. So there’s another another curveball for you. So hey, Damon, first off, I want to thank everybody out there today for joining us. A huge, huge thank you to Rosemary, but before we wind down, so we talked about hero, your who is your hero growing up, my last question for you is going to be 2023. You’re coming in with justice, great attitude, just high level goals for 2023. Who are what is your inspiration? For 2023? Who are what you feel is like just your driving force or your inspiration? For 2023?
Rosemary Ravinal 52:26
That’s a difficult one. I have several and they might get a little political. So I’m not going to answer. I’m not going to answer that. Truthfully. I’m going to say my grandchildren,
Curt Anderson 52:39
and we were just talking about so she has a five and an eight year old grandson, they’re in Oakland, California.
Rosemary Ravinal 52:45
So they are my inspiration because I feel that everything I do I do for them role model to be their guiding light. And they are both very articulate. They have tremendous verbal skills. And they are there their thought leaders already have and even though one is in kindergarten, and the other was in third grade, yeah. And it’s just there. They inspire me. And sometimes when we’re together and we’re reading stories together, there’s just some way of looking at the world. This is very different. That just inspires me. So they are they are my inspiration. Well, what
Curt Anderson 53:24
a great answer there and she doesn’t look old enough to be a grandmother does she so button, a grant in your grandchildren’s names,
Rosemary Ravinal 53:33
Morrison, and Vega. Vega like the brightest, the second brightest star in the solar system is the Vega second to the sun. Just a little tidbit. So she is a shining light. Awesome. Cool. All right.
Curt Anderson 53:49
Well, Damon, it just it never disappoints when you’re when you just get a little dose of rosemary does it? It does not worry. And we just we’ve got a long way to go. But we’re getting there. Right? We’re eager learners and we’re trying to that’s why we bring her on to help. Well, the answer is I think you were five and oh man, that was very impressive.
Damon Pistulka 54:09
Just because I can answer the questions doesn’t mean I’m good at something.
Curt Anderson 54:14
Oh, you’re so modest. So last parting words of wisdom. Anything that you want to share with everybody. Regret drink water. He is going to get drink while you’re out there. Hydrate. Hydrate is perfect. And her newsletter. Let me go back to our newsletter by she’s right. She’s hydrating. Rosemary has a phenomenal newsletter. I read it religiously every week.
It’s just great, powerful tips, strategies on how to be a better communicator with your doing public speaking. So share things like what you should eat. It’s perfect. I’d now pay attention like I did a Power BI before you and I would do our show. And I’m choking on my power buyer. So now I’ll eat a banana or something that goes down a little smoother, you know? So yeah. So any any party last words of wisdom for everybody as we wind down
Rosemary Ravinal 55:01
Jamie’s giving me his cold.
Damon Pistulka 55:02
Yeah, we got, we got the old cough coming across,
Rosemary Ravinal 55:06
don’t take it for granted. Look at everything that you learn about speaking, you can apply to your family life, to your relations, to your to every member of your family. And it’s so important to be consciously communicating, conscious, be aware of everything you say, take a five second pause, or you say something if you’re in disagreement, or you’re angry. This is saying that the the biggest speech that you will ever regret is the one that you get when you’re angry. So you can’t take it back and look at how much conflict happens in the world when people are speaking from anger. Yeah, yes, take that
Damon Pistulka 55:48
five second pile into 10. Counting to 10
Curt Anderson 55:51
to 10 to three.
Rosemary Ravinal 55:54
Right, it seems like an eternity where essentially five is a good number,
Curt Anderson 55:57
right? Where they say, you know, whatever you’re angry about right in the sand. You know, let the wave kind of take it away. So I will wind down on this. So Damon, what a gift what a blessing. So hey, guys, anybody out there? Do a favor, connect with rosemary on LinkedIn, you want to check her out? Sign up for her newsletter. You’re just it’s you’re going to step up your game tremendously. You’ll think demonized later for this. How about if you’ve been sitting down? How about everybody give a stand. And let’s get a raw roaring round of applause for rosemary. So thank you.
Rosemary Ravinal 56:31
We’re going to spin live and connected to us. Thank you. Thank you for taking the time, guys. Thank
Curt Anderson 56:37
you for joining us. And thank you. This is just such a special occasion. This was so great. I checked her. No, I’m visiting her, her her her community. And I was like, Hey, I’m going to be in town. Could we get together and we’ve known each other for a couple years now.
And she was like, Oh, absolutely. Then I put her in a spot like, Hey, you want to do a LinkedIn live with Damon and I? And she was like, Oh, of course I do. I’m all in so hey, we got Lisa here today. Lisa, thank you for joining us, at least is in Michigan. So Lisa, I’m here with my friend rosemary, you definitely want to connect. Lisa’s phenomenal. She’s with a manufacturer in Indiana. She’s
Damon Pistulka 57:11
asking where to get to the news and subscribe to the newsletter to
Rosemary Ravinal 57:15
do something else very quickly. There’s no such thing as a dull speech, because many people who are manufacturing might say, Well, what I do is so technical or it’s it’s dull, it’s sort of inside baseball. It’s it’s not about the speeches about doing it from a adult perspective.
It’s adult speaker delivers adult speech. It’s not the other way around, right. You can have any subject and then they represent the newsletter to a very famous TED talk from someone who did his talk about how to tie your shoelaces. 4.5 million views how to tie you did it in an imaginative way within a doozy. Right with with love for the topic.
Curt Anderson 57:58
So and how can they find the newsletter,
Rosemary Ravinal 58:01
Rosemary ravenel.com just opt in to download any of my PDFs. I get PDFs on executive presence and how to do presentations, how to do a podcast I have a PDF you can download for free. So once you get into my inner circle in all those ways, you’ll be automatically subscribed to my newsletter.
Curt Anderson 58:19
Yeah, absolutely. So connect with rosemary here on LinkedIn from LinkedIn, you can just hop right into her website and again, sign up for that newsletter and you guys will absolutely love it. So
Damon Pistulka 58:34
Whoa, we had Kurt dropped off there. So we’re having some technical difficulties, but I just want to say thank you everyone for being here today. Kurt and rosemary in the same spot was awesome. And I didn’t even know what to say here. Thanks everyone for watching. Have a great weekend. Garden. I say goodbye for today and we’ll be back again next week.