damon, dorie clark, learn, talk, tina marie, julia, feel, good, inspires, big, learning, habits, strategies, resiliency, luis, marathon training, coaching, man, thinking, coach
Frans van Loef, Julia Phelan, Damon Pistulka, Curt Anderson, Tina Marie St.Cyr, Luis Velasquez
Julia Phelan 00:00
I put my water down there in case I need it up here.
Damon Pistulka 00:06
All right, everyone, welcome once again, it is Friday. And of course we are live again with the manufacturing ecommerce success. Success can’t even talk laughing so hard before we got on. And my friend and co host Curt Anderson over there. It doesn’t look like he’s broadcasting from his normal location. In fact, Kurt’s got some guests with him today that I’m gonna let him introduce and we’re gonna get going here. And I want to just first of all, welcome everyone. Welcome, Kurt. Let us know what the heck is going on.
Curt Anderson 00:39
Man. I’m trying to figure that out myself. Here, Damon. So Happy Friday. Happy lucky Friday, two dudes. So hey,
Damon Pistulka 00:46
hat. Bigger right on time.
Curt Anderson 00:49
holy cows are right on time. So Dan, we did that just for you, dude. So alright. Happy Friday, everybody. This is going to be a great conversation. This is my honor and privilege and do introduce my besties here. So I’ve got Damon we we’d like baseball just a little bit, right. Just a little bit. So we have a gentleman from Netherlands so we’re I’m not sure we will. He might not get my baseball. My bad baseball jokes. But we’ll see how that goes France. So I didn’t get them either. Yeah, she does. Julie doesn’t get them. Yeah, so yeah, we’ve got Alright, let’s start. Okay, so let’s go with my dear friend Luis. He’s a repeat offender on the program. So Dr. Luis, happy Friday. How are you? Dude?
Luis Velasquez 01:27
I am doing fantastic. Thank you for having me. So hey, I’ve
Curt Anderson 01:30
been practicing the salt like fruit since January the last quiz, right the last class. I’d see I even butchered that. Damon. So we’ve got Tina Marie St. St. Cyr, right. Tina Marie. Happy Friday. How are you? Stroz goat? Yeah, she’s rooting for the Astros right where they’re gonna take it in three four.
Damon Pistulka 01:50
Ah, no, that’s okay.
Curt Anderson 01:54
We have Dr. Julia feeling good. Sitting right here. So
Julia Phelan 01:59
hello. Nice to be here. Also a repeat offender I think maybe twice. Repeat if we have we have several
Curt Anderson 02:04
repeat offenders, right?
Damon Pistulka 02:05
Yes, we do.
Frans van Loef 02:08
Fans Happy Friday. Thanks. And then wonderful to be here. What a big surprise. Sue’s
Curt Anderson 02:12
awesome. So hey, we’re and we’re in the Big Apple today, Damon. So this is awesome. Hey, I see we’ve got some friends dropping notes. Let us know that you’re out there drop a big low we have a dynamic conversation going. So we’re gonna go around the horn, little baseball expression. We’re gonna go around the horn and I’m just going to give a shout out like what does everybody do here? So Luis, how do you make the world a better place? Just give us give us your superpowers. What are you doing?
Luis Velasquez 02:36
Well, I’ll tell my child my superpower. Is this. The superpower cook I cook I go Yeah, so I think that I make a better world by just making full time kids so they can grow to be humble, to be kind to be resilient and better people. So that’s my vote. That’s that’s what I do is I try to grow humans that are resilient and kind and strong. On free time,
Tina Marie St.Cyr 03:01
he’s also a very excellent executive coach on my
Luis Velasquez 03:05
free time I do executive coaching and I coach usually executives that are highly valuable in organizations. Sometimes organizations cannot afford to lose but they are difficult to work with.
Curt Anderson 03:18
Jeff demon that’s kind of how you describe me right so the work with right so that’s why I’m with Luis I’m trying to work on that so
Damon Pistulka 03:25
so I was just wondering if you’re subtly given me a hint there Kurt.
Curt Anderson 03:30
That’s why I brought these guys in like this is an intervention Damon so sorry. Yeah, yes. You’re just finding out the hard way. So anyway, I so moved again. So you know, Luis, amazing, incredible family man, just a great inspiration. Wonderful father. And so a couple other things that we’re gonna talk about he was in Dorie Clark’s book. Remember when he was on the program last time we talked about how he was he was featured in Dorie Clark’s books, we might hit that up? That’s how I this guy came on my radar. So Tina Marie, my friend, how do you make the world a better place?
Tina Marie St.Cyr 04:00
Well, recently, I started with stand up comedy. So we’ll see where that goes, if I don’t bomb, right. But I love working with business owners that have teams and they want to create a culture of collaboration and put humans first so that they have an emotional quotient for all the work that they do. It’s not just about economics, it’s about the emotions and it’s about people being happy where they are, and feeling purposeful in what they do. And it starts with a business owner knowing that they control the culture and bring the team around that so I love working with teams
Curt Anderson 04:30
in the name your coaching business, please. Bonfire coaching, bonfire coaching Daymond member Do you remember? Remember the chatbox when Tina Marie was on last time like she kind of blew it? I was on fire. Yeah, I think she broke a record. So alright, let’s come over to Dr. Julia. feelin good. All right. So Dr. Julia, She’s the Chief Learning Officer at 211. And let’s just Julia, how do you how do you make the world a better place?
Julia Phelan 04:53
Oh my goodness. Where do I even start? I make the world a better place by helping ng people teach things veteran things better. So, you know, organizations spend a ton of money pumped pumped into learning and development programs. But is it really the right stuff? Is it really working? How do we know that so I help organizations figure that out and help them better meet their goals that they that they want to meet by improving and optimizing that learning.
Curt Anderson 05:23
Perfect and she has like a wonderful little three step program. She was at our jam session last month. So guys, you can go on our website, check out Dr. Julia. feelin good. She’s got all sorts of powerful tips and strategies to help learn, and how teach, especially our manufacturing friends out there how to processes. Friends, my friend, you crossed the pond to hang out with us for this little weekend here in New York City. How do you make the world a better place?
Frans van Loef 05:47
Well, you know, it started at home, I’m married to carry entrepreneurial we have four kids. And that’s Sunday, you know, I ended wake up and I felt like I had I have to buy a new house because the house is so full with stuff. We have to move. Then I realized that at home, we have five collectors, we have five people, we’re only bringing in new stuff day after day. So I started to think, you know, we need someone who’s offloading who gets rid of stuff. So that’s basically where it started. So I was the only one who was removing stuff. And that’s not what I’m doing. As you know, as a professional, I help organizations and teams who are also non stop adding new things. I have to start off loud because that’s something we’re not that good at. That’s basically what I’m doing.
Curt Anderson 06:29
Now their job to make they’re just so yeah, right. That was so that’s so Franz is going to have to be back on the program again. So he’s the only non offender here out of this motley. Yeah. So we will have to have him back on what do you think?
Damon Pistulka 06:44
I I feel you fronds because that’s my house. That’s my house. I mean, I’m the one that that we have a collection area in our garage that this is going to the donation center. It’s it’s permanent collection center area in the garage. Yeah. All right.
Curt Anderson 07:04
So so let’s dig in. So the topic today is like how to light that fire. Okay, how do you like that fire inside of you? Right. And so these guys are all coaches, and they work with high level, folks. And so Luis, I’m gonna start with you. We had a great conversation last night. And so you threw out a tagline? I’m gonna, I’m shamelessly shamelessly I’m just blatantly stealing it from you. So he was talking about how, like, certain things in life are just they’re really simple. But they’re just not easy. It’s simple to like, eat healthy, but it’s not always easy. You know, it’s like, simple to think about, it’s simple to exercise, but you’ve got to like, take that next step. So let’s go here. When you’re coaching with folks, you’re, I call you like, you’re the blind spot remover, right? Like you difficult folks, and how do you remove that blind spot? What are some tips strategies that you could that you use with your clients? Or somebody out there could like, how could they make things that are a little simpler, and, and maybe easy?
Luis Velasquez 07:59
Um, I think that, for me, the most important thing to to understand is what is their motivation, because that’s the fire that will make things move forward. Because because it’s because it’s not easy, it requires that sometimes we make some sacrifices. And then it requires that we have to make some concessions. And a lot of times those are difficult to make, unless we have a really strong motivation, intrinsic motivation, that will that that pushes in to be uncomfortable. So give you an example from a CEO that he was a micromanager and he did not want to change is saying he didn’t want to change. And one day we were talking and I told him, you know, like, you know, you can Europe founder, and as a founder, you’re gonna be here forever, as a CEO, this is gonna be temporary. Whether you stay here for a long time, or you’re kicked out is temporary. So the question for you is, how long do you want to be the CEO of the company? And he said, Well, I want to be here for a long time. I want to be the manager. Everybody wants to have that. What’d he say that I use that as a motivation, okay, so if you want to be the manager that everybody wants to have, and you want to be here for a long time, you need to change certain things about you. And that is what propelled him to be uncomfortable because he didn’t want to lose the company that he founded. Does that make sense? Yeah, so I think that is not about what do you do, but why are you doing it is the most important part. You tapped into this fuel? Yeah. All right. Let’s
Curt Anderson 09:49
just savor that. We’re
Damon Pistulka 09:50
just gonna sit here for a second. It’s
Curt Anderson 09:53
right. Simple, not easy. It’s focusing on the Y, right. It’s focusing on the Y I love that. All right, Tina. Rei, bonfire coaching right here, man, this woman is on fire. She’s doing little comedy bit tomorrow. So you incorporate comedy with your coaching, you do high level executives, you have a mastermind all sorts of things that you’re helping people. What are some things that you love to apply to? It’s going to ignite that fire with your clients?
Tina Marie St.Cyr 10:15
Well, going back to the, it may be simple but not easy. Yeah. What I love that you shared, Luis is that you’re finding the fuel where someone’s inherent fuel source that they can tap into and sustain even through the hard times. Right where that challenge is, for me this year, I have focused on habits, looking at the simple habits and restructuring those. And it may seem like common sense, or wrote that we’re supposed to do it this way. It’s not easy. Because if we need to first look inside of ourselves and see, what do we truly want to create? And then where are we our own obstacle in that. And there’s this amazing book, if you have not read it or put it on your books or book lists, it’s atomic habits by James clear, amazing book, I think I highlighted the whole thing. So it’s now a yellow. And what are two things that I said, I’m gonna pick up two of his strategies inside and apply it this year. And it has changed my life, my business and even my relationships, I set the room. So setting the room means that you put things back in an order, the way that you want it to be optimally ordered. And why that can change and make things easier is because you’re putting that effort in and it’s not like you’re letting things pile up. You’re handling it in the moment. And you could do that with your thoughts handle it in the moment. Well, if you’ve got worry, if you’ve got frustration, if you’ve got anxiety, learn strategies to handle it in the moment, as opposed to letting it stack for me making the bed every day we’ve seen the YouTube videos and why that’s important. It totally works. You know, taking my vitamins every day. Another one of his strategies is that you put things in a place where it’s easy, it’s in front of you, you can’t miss it. And then if you do, he’s got guilt. So guilt can be a motivator, right? And so the vitamins every day, right by the toaster, right by the coffee maker, I’m not gonna have a pot of coffee until I make halfway. So these things, how does that transfer into business, do the things every day that are small that you know add up to energy because that energy whenever you alleviate your worry and your frustration, your guilt, it’s gonna about a value that energy that you’re going to make progress with. And so small decisions done repeatedly over time build greater habits, you believe you believe in yourself, you have confidence, when you have confidence, you’re a different person, you’re easier to get along with. And then your goals become a fuel source that you can put that fuel into. So my idea, my strategy here is do things habitually read the book, do things habitually, and then do simple things every day, because you’ll feel better about yourself, and you’ll have that fuel to put into things that matter. Another one,
Curt Anderson 13:02
another one. Yeah, another moment of silence right there. So
Damon Pistulka 13:07
and the thing that I think a lot of people get hung up in, like, especially especially, I always love this, you know, the New Year’s resolutions, and people are gonna go, I’m gonna get I’m gonna work out, right, I’m gonna go to the gym, I’m god, this whole thing. So you see him, and they go to the gym. And they think they have to do every exercise under the sun because they’re going to the gym, right? And we don’t we, we think when we change a habit that we gotta go all in right away, rather than make little tiny changes that are like, Okay, I’m going to maybe I’m going to put my gym clothes on today. And I’m going to walk to the mailbox and back or something like that. I’m not even going to the gym yet. And then the next day, maybe I walk a little more, and then maybe three weeks from then I’ve walked enough. So maybe it’s time for me to start going to the gym. And I do want to exercise at the gym. Because when you do these big chunks like this, it’s not it’s too big of a change too fast. That’s my experience with that. But that’s great stuff. These habits these just little and putting them together like you said is so key.
Tina Marie St.Cyr 14:13
The biggest thing is to keep your word to yourself because we lie to ourselves more than anybody else. Well, and if you just keep your word to yourself every day, I mean before you put your head on the pillow look over your day go did I keep my word to myself. And then apologize to yourself if you didn’t keep your word to yourself tomorrow and I love that name and one thing little thing, put your gym clothes on, take a walk around the block, do something simple working out for one minute is still working out.
Curt Anderson 14:39
Okay, guys, so good. Damon, I told you this is gonna be a powerhouse. So, guys, if you’re just joining us, drop us a note. Let us know as you’re here. Give a big hello to our esteemed panel here today. This is man we’re just trying to light the fire under you and help you set your goals or hit your goals. We’ve talked about Louisa stopped and talked about the why we’re now talking about this Just you know, go out and get that book atomic habits. It’s a fantastic book. So let’s come over to my friend Dr. Julia. So she Daymond she traveled all the way from Malibu just to hang out here with us in New York City, man, how about that one? Huh? So, Dr. Julia does she loves chick striking today, doesn’t she? Gosh, it looks amazing. So, alright, so you are the chief learning officer. And a big thing for like, you know, I found is like, a great way to help people learn things is bring a passion, right? Bring something with a fire, we come in very kind of like humdrum or it’s boring. You know, it’s hard to light that fire. How do you encourage like, folks or companies, organizations, you work? Like, how do you like that fire to get that learning point across?
Julia Phelan 15:40
I mean, I think there’s a whole bunch of things. And I think a few things that have been touched on, you know, in terms of, you know, what’s motivating people to what is something that is going to speak to them you can have, you could look at two people, you could be teaching something or in some kind of workshop, and they both could be looking at you with this kind of blank stare. But underneath that could be completely different things, right? One of them could be thinking, Oh, I don’t think this trainer person likes me keeps giving me a side, I don’t I don’t know. And another person could be thinking, Oh, last time I was in one of these things, it was just such a drag. I didn’t get anything out of it. And but you as the as the training deliver up, listen, you have no idea what’s behind that. So one aspect of of when we are teaching more effectively, is really trying to figure out how can we diagnose some of those motivational hurdles, potentially, and figure out how to overcome them how to help people see, like, Hey, you can do this, so there isn’t something in your way. Or if somebody is in a negative emotional state, it’s really difficult to get them to learn anything, because all of this space in their brain is filled up with thinking about something else. And last time I was on, we talked a little bit about that first day of school first day of work idea, you know, and it’s, it’s very similar, right? That you think that you show up on your, for your first day at work on a new job, for example, and there’s a whole bunch of stuff that could go wrong there that would cause you to disengage, to switch off to not be have that fire lit inside of you. And so, you know, I think it’s all about thinking about you know, and again, connecting to what Tina Marie was saying these, these small things that are all going to make a really big impact. And you know, if you can make people feel welcome when they first arrive in a new place, if you can help them see that, yeah, they do belong there. They are a fit for that place it people believe in them, people are expecting them to be there. And then giving them things to do that can give them some small wins, right that that it’s not just okay. My husband years ago has a friend of his was writing his dissertation, and he would write every day on his To Do List, write dissertation. Well, you’ve written a dissertation, it doesn’t like that’s not a great list is every day my husband will call him and he say, What are you doing today? He’s like, I gotta go buy some pans. He’s like, what is that? Well, I got on my list. I’ve got write dissertation, and I’ve got by pans. So that’s how it’s all gonna go by some hands. Yeah. And so now it’s the became this, this sort of standing light. When I say to my husband, like, what are you doing is like, I’ve been buying pants all day. Yeah. And so the only way you can ever move forward on your right dissertation is you got to say, Okay, go write the first line or write the first page or work on the first chapter or some smaller piece that you can actually achieve. And then you can feel some sense of satisfaction that you actually did it. If your goal is write dissertation. Well, forget it. You’ll never do it. Yeah. Yeah. So buy don’t buy pants all the time,
Curt Anderson 18:42
man. So understand your why. Atomic habits. Buy pants, right? That’s, that’s that. All right, that’s three. Or don’t write or don’t buy pants either way right by him or go buy a jacket. chunk it down. So yeah. So the takeaway is like, whatever the hard thing is, skip that and go to the bypass. I’m kidding. I’m kidding.
Julia Phelan 19:08
Just make your make your thing something that has to do with your golf.
Curt Anderson 19:14
Because I that way, I’m getting prepared for my dissertation, right?
Julia Phelan 19:19
Damon Pistulka 19:21
What do you got? Well, it’s just, it’s just, you see, people just swirl in this toilet bowl of how am I going to get this done so much. If they would just stop the swirl and go, I’m gonna take step, point. 001. And then I’m gonna go a point 002 After that, pretty soon, they’re halfway done and they don’t even realize it.
Julia Phelan 19:48
One step at a time. That’s right. Yeah.
Curt Anderson 19:52
You just climb the Space Needle. What was that last weekend? two weekends ago and
Damon Pistulka 19:57
that’s all I did. I
Curt Anderson 19:58
just said man just saw Given time fundraiser so you nine minutes Great. God bless you, dude. So alright, let’s come on to France, France. Are you going to talk these guys really? What do you got? What do you got first? How do you
Frans van Loef 20:11
know adding to it? No, but you know what one thing I like to answer is you mentioned curtains, you are owner of the supermarkets. And one day you enter a supermarket and in front of supermarkets are very nice and Pedic women, and she has a product with her and it’s an a drink from the Fiji Islands. And as we all know, if he islands you know, people live longer than anywhere in the Senate. So you think I must sell this product, I know what I have to get this product, there is only one issue, you know, your shelf space is just covered in products, there is no free space. So what do you do? You’re designed to remove a product from the shelf because you think I’m going to sell this product because it’s going to be a best seller. So what does it mean? You know, we all are facing new stuff every time but what we forget to do is if we want to bring in something new, we have to remove something. So I call this the shelf space principle. So anytime you consider bringing a new thing to whatever you’re doing, think about what am I going to remove from my shelf space. That’s what I want to add to this great story of the people in this room. And
Curt Anderson 21:28
Luis Velasquez 21:29
I have I have a rule in my closet. I only have 32 pieces of clothing. That’s it. I don’t know why 32 I have no idea. I don’t know where I come up with it. But in order for me to introduce something new to my closet, I run with something else. And I’ve been doing this for years. So I only have 32 pieces of cloth. And that’s it. And that’s helpful because now I think Microsoft never gets so backed up with a bunch of stuff. But here’s what I here’s what I here’s what I notice, you know, on the train here, you know, like if you think about this, you know, thinking about the strategy. And I think that always starts with what do you want to be, you know, say I want to be a marathoner. You know, I, that’s the idea. I’m called a marathoner, and then that’s, that’s the mindset, the identity, then it comes down to the learning, okay, I need to learn how to run, you know, optimize your learning, I need to I need to learn certain skills that will allow me to do some running, you know, then it comes down to the habits, you know, okay, I’m gonna get up every morning, I’m gonna put my you know, my my cloths right there, so I can see them. But at the same time, I need to also prioritize what I need to let go off. So if you think about that, that is a strategy. You know, in order for you to become a marathoner, you need to learn how to run, you need to create habits that will sustain the run, and you need to prioritize what you want to do or not.
Tina Marie St.Cyr 22:55
Why? Like, why would you want to be a marathoner?
Julia Phelan 22:57
Alright, one improve my health. And I think another really key thing in all of that, and I love that Luis, that that sort of package of things, is you also need somebody to help you get better, right? Because if we keep doing the same thing over and over again, then either we’re possibly doing the wrong thing, right. And we’ve got the wrong running strategy or the wrong running technique. And we’re just kind of rehearsing that over and over. So we need someone else to be giving us feedback on what we’re doing. And if we’re not doing it, right to course, correct that. And that’s a really, really incredibly important piece of any kind of learning experience is you can’t just do it on your own. You need someone else who has expertise to be helping you see, okay, yeah, that’s good. But you know, don’t keep doing that. If you’re, if you’re practicing your basketball throw, and you’re not doing it the right way. You’re just going to keep getting better at the bad thing. So we want people to be getting better at the good things that they need some expert input from a coach and some feedback is a really key piece of that recipe.
Damon Pistulka 24:01
Yeah, we used to talk about that all all the time in baseball, I used to be part of a baseball club. And they up I have to, you need the coaches to help you to learn how to practice the right way, because then you’re practicing the right way. And it’s not you’re just practicing to be practicing. Right. It’s a great point. Great point.
Luis Velasquez 24:20
Yes. It was like to the idea of it is simple. Yeah. But it’s not easy. Yeah, there’s people that are smokers, and they know that, that that that is smoking is bad for them. And you can say you all you have to do is to stop smoking. That is so simple, is not easy. And that’s where you know, that’s what you need help. Yeah.
Tina Marie St.Cyr 24:42
And I believe it takes being humble and courageous. Because in order to get better, like Julie is saying is we need to face where we are right now and that we need to to move aside that thinking that we’re not good enough, or that if we compare ourselves to anybody else, we just simply need to need to start and be willing to be humble. All that we need to learn. And once we are open to learning, then we can improve. I liken it to an etch a sketch who here is old enough to remember it’s a sketch. So you put the picture tediously onto the edge of sketch and have some pride in it and gingerly show your parents without shaking. But there comes a time where we need to shake the Etch A Sketch, and be willing to learn and see a whole new picture. But without that, then we wouldn’t be vulnerable, so that we can learn even if we want to be a marathoner, like me going into comedy, it was on my bucket list for 30 plus years, and I just got tired of saying, I want to do that someday. And finally, I said, I’m just gonna do it. And so even bone, it’s okay, because the main thing is the big checkmark that I kept my word to myself, and I’m doing it, right. And that’s what learning is about is being willing to be vulnerable. And courageous.
Curt Anderson 25:57
Right, I have to love that. And so let’s, let’s hit on humility, that’s where I wanted to go next. So I’m going to come over to you friends, so humility, when you’re working with a coach, like you just said, you know, like, to get into coaching, or you know, the to that you need a coach, right? And so when you’re working with your folks, like how any tips advice of like, you know, when do you know that you need help, when you know, that it’s time to like, you know, it takes a village to raise a raise a business, right? You know, raise a child, you know, organization, what have you how, what are some tips that you work with, when you work with your executive coaches on humility to like take on coaching take on or when you need to raise your hand for help.
Frans van Loef 26:33
But you know, I think also there’s so that people are looking for help, but they just want some reflection, you know, first first day start someone to talk to, and then they then often you see that they are realizing, you know, I could use some help for a lot of people is much easier to experience it and then get into that already to sink upfront, we need some help. And understanding that at least I account very often is also based on what all of us just said that people are extremely talented in creating needless complexity. You know, we I mean, we can start with a small ID and we can immediately think of a few other things. And I asked her, do you think I have two more since I asked Tina. And I ended up with 12 things on a very simple thing. And the answer is, oh, my gosh, this is way too complex. And that’s also when people start to think, oh, I need some help.
Curt Anderson 27:24
Yeah. needless complexity. Can you add to that? Well, yeah, that’s right. How many like who’s guilty of like, needless complexity, right? Like, let’s make this as complicated as possible, right? If it’s complicated must be good, because nobody else will do it. Well, nobody’s going to do because it’s too complex, like, have you have your folks navigate that.
Julia Phelan 27:44
To me, what comes to mind with that is, is figuring out, you know, I’ve talked to you a little bit about this idea of, you know, the expert blind spot, and how we’re really, it’s really difficult for people to teach things to other people when they are themselves experts, because they’ve got such a deep, deep level of expertise in this, you know, unconscious competence, that when they come to, to talk to a novice, it’s very difficult for them to figure out how can I break what I what I already have in my head down to these more simple steps. And that’s a really, really, really important point. Because again, back to thinking about motivation. If you if you’re a learner, and you’re trying to learn something from someone who has glossed over all of the introductory foundational stuff, you’re just completely lost. And this person could be the biggest genius on Earth, but doesn’t matter to you, because you’re just still stuck back at what did he say? This is cool. Yeah. And so it’s you, when we think about simplification in learning, what we’re really thinking about is again, back to that all comes back to the steps to is, if you’re teaching someone something, you have to figure out what your what’s their prior knowledge, where are they at in their particular journey? And how can I meet them where they are to move them forward, and try and get past my own expertise and the my own blind spots and figure out, you know, I need to make sure that I’m not using terminology that other people don’t understand. I’m not using jargon, I’m not yet skipping over things that to me feel automatic, because it’s like driving a car the first time you do it, it’s really difficult. And you’re like, where’s the signal? And where’s all the pieces? But nowadays, you get a new car, and you just driving and think about it, right? So you have to remember, what was it like to be that new person? What was it like to be the kid the first day getting into the car and going over it? You know, I don’t know how to do it. Right. Right. So it’s, it’s really embracing that because then you can put yourself in the shoes of that of that nucleus,
Curt Anderson 29:38
right? This complexity. How are we doing on time? All right, well, we got plenty of time and I want to go here. Go ahead, Dana.
Damon Pistulka 29:43
Well, and when you do that, it is so I mean, you have to be really knowledgeable to explain complex things to a third grader. And I always like to think about the third grader, right because if I can explain something that simply First of all, I might be able to understand it. But second of all, then it really helps everyone. Like you said, you can help everyone start from the same place. Even people that are different levels. If you start at that level and work your way up, then you know, everyone has that base understanding. And I think in business, a lot of times I see that that people are starting here, or they really should start everyone here. Even if you’ve got people all along the spectrum. Start everyone here. And yes, I might be a little bit bored at the beginning. But as we work through, then everyone has that consistent understanding on on whatever you’re trying to accomplish.
Julia Phelan 30:34
And you give them a little bit of rehearsal and refreshment to or refreshing Yeah, those people. So even if they already know it, it’s like, hey, wouldn’t hurt to hear it again. Anyway, for those folks. Yeah. Yeah. Like
Frans van Loef 30:45
it once he was atomic habit, you know, because I think maybe there’s actually but I think it’s hilarious that people are looking for a personal coach for exercising for physicals. You know, because it’s the same with MMA, you only need one small thing to start doing. But it’s so why is it so difficult? And then why are so many people using a personal coach for physical exercises? I mean, I think it’s insane. When Read, read the atomic habit book, listen to these kind of things. And you can you can start,
Curt Anderson 31:13
right, a lot of it’s the accountability, right? You know, you know, back to like, your husband with his buddy, the dissertation, you know, it’s just having that accountability, let’s go to inspiration for each other ourselves as a team, like, what, what and who I think I know your answer, what, who inspires you to, you know, like that, who lights the fire for you, as you execute your career.
Luis Velasquez 31:37
Um, I think that my family is my children. And I don’t consider this my career, I consider this a way of life. You know, and, and I learned a lot from my children. And what I realized is that the same problems that my children have, are the same problems that I see with executives, be nice, you know, wait, your turn, literally, you know, where you turn, you know, don’t don’t take it personal, is the same thing. The only differences, that is the stakes are much higher, and the ego gets in the way. So my inspiration that I get is literally from, from, from, from, from the struggles that my children have. And that’s one. And the other one is, you know, I think that a lot of many of us are misunderstood. And a lot of the clients that I work with, have the best intentions in the world. They don’t wake up in the morning saying, I’m gonna be an a call today. You know, they don’t, nobody does, you know, I just said they, they, they either don’t have the mindset, the skills or the habits in order to, you know, to, to, to, to have the impact that they want to have. And that’s what I that’s what I do.
Curt Anderson 32:55
Great answer how, Tina Marie, how about you? What inspires you? How do you like that fire as you’d like, you know, carry your cars.
Tina Marie St.Cyr 33:02
Thank you for that question. One thing I want to add to Yes, he’s so eloquent, I love listening to and speaking, is that what I think is that you’re helping people instill self trust. Because we lose our trust in ourselves, whenever there’s pain in our life? Or when there’s doubt, or we get some feedback from people, you know, unconsciously we take things personally. And then as we surface it, then we can work with it. That’s trust. Trust is this beautiful energy that has us all lean into learning, doesn’t it? Yeah. So what inspires me, my beautiful wife and family and my children. You know, having a career is your passion and what you do and how you serve people, yet, I think, reflecting each day to know that you did do good, because we can, you know, have days that just stuck on top of each other and go by and we forget to connect and say, Am I happy? Am I bringing joy to my life and others, and it takes those little moments just to steal ourselves and and reflect. And for me, I do that habitually in the morning, some gratitude exercises. But more than that throughout the day, like we’re in NYC here. And so we’ve met a lot of Uber drivers over the last couple of days, and lots of people. And so what I what I love to do is spend time doing my best to to meet people eye to eye, especially strangers, because if we can see each other eye to eye humans, it helps us feel connected in a different level. But I’m in a city where I’m noticing nobody looks each other eye to eye. And I’m like wow, let’s take some time there. Right so to slow down, eye to eye and celebrate your wins each day.
Curt Anderson 34:49
Well love it and trust and looking people in the eye right? So all right, this is fantastic. All right. How about Julia what inspires you as you are building your cars at 211?
Julia Phelan 35:00
Oh, wow, um, I’m gonna have to say my husband and my family. But my husband is an educator and just the most amazingly gifted educator and I learned so much from him every day. And he and I just geek out on stuff like this all the time, you know, we, every time we go out, that’s all we talk about. It’s just learning and stuff like that. So he’s a great inspiration to me. And just seeing he, he teaches his huge classes at UCLA, like, we have 300 plus students, and just to see the way he connects with them and engages with them. And lots of people would think, Oh, it’s such a negative being in a big class like that, but, but to have a teacher like him, and my middle son who’s in college right now, he, he would always go to my husband’s class, you know, when he was when he was able to last year, the year before. And now he’s in college himself. He says to him, he’s like Daddy says, you’ve just ruined me, he’s like, because no one is as good as you.
Damon Pistulka 36:04
Julia Phelan 36:05
He’s like, all these teachers. I mean, they’re all smart and everything, but they’re nowhere near as good at teaching as us. So that makes sense.
Curt Anderson 36:12
Awesome. So great answer friends, for kids who and what inspires you as you execute your cause everybody to do? Well, little
Frans van Loef 36:20
surprise show, but as well, the family of one, group two as well. But you know, it’s a funny, I have three daughters and a son. And one of my daughters, I don’t recall what it was, she asked me. I mean, what are you doing for work? And then I said, I think she was maybe like, 10 or 11? And I said, Well, you know, I go out, and I talked to a lot of people. She’ll say that those Look at me, but you can’t talk to us all day. So you don’t have to go out anymore. And then it starts you truly make see these kind of questions. They really trigger you. I mean, they’re racking What am I doing? You know, so I love to kind of questions from from from kids and also from my wife. But another source also for me is that I think we all have the same experience. Sometimes you run by coincidence, in into a person on a day in any place. And for whatever reason you get in an in a conversation. Often these are incredible, also inspiring, because it because you know, you didn’t know it was going to happen, and you have no clue who is in front of you. You have no clue what you’re going to talk about. But it’s always been a rare exception is an incredible source of inspiration. people you don’t know. And probably you’re never ever going to meet again. So this was something I really like. Yeah.
Curt Anderson 37:32
Awesome. Okay. What inspires me, and so, Damon, you know, my daughter, my wife, these guys here, you know, so it’s, you know, I don’t mean to be cliche, but it’s just, you know, I’m very passionate about what I do. And it’s just, you know, helping people, you know, it’s like when you can see, when you get those wins, and you just, you know, you get, you know, it’s always it feels good when you get the email or the tach like, Hey, this is awesome, thank you so and so forth. And you just love that but like think, I think when you pour your heart and soul and the people and you get that, you know, like, you know, you know, people like, man, sometimes I feel like you care about my business more than I do. You know, it’s like, you know, just like, just leaving it on the table, man, it’s like, I feel an obligation to, you know, like, exhaust My God, given whatever I have on a daily basis. And if I don’t, it’s like, shame on me, you know? So, Damon, how about you? What, who and what inspires you brother?
Damon Pistulka 38:23
Well, you know, it’s similar to a lot of people, they’re my family, you know, that’s, that’s what keeps me trying to be a better person, I think a lot of the time because, you know, you really can see it in your life. It’s so immediate around you when you become a better person, how it affects your life and your family. And that but you know, that’s that I guess, when you break my dharma down really into the whole whole thing it is, you know, to leave everybody that I touch with with a positive feeling about me whether they agree with me or not, but that’s that’s what I tried to do in my business work helping helping owners grow their businesses and so on. But it’s really about that leaving that positive impact for people and and just knowing the in that passion, you talked about passion and desire and drive and all that. The desire to do as much as that is, or my thing is I can in my life is what drives me every day. For my family and for everyone. It just just wakes me up in the middle of the night. Not in a bad way, just in a good way. It’s like I got to do this.
Curt Anderson 39:28
That’s the thing. Absolutely. So I so we’re gonna start I know we got a couple more minutes we’re gonna start winding so but because we got a few more minutes, so I’m gonna go I’ve got one more question. I don’t want that one. There we go. Damon any comments that you want to pull up? And yeah, Dan pulled this
Damon Pistulka 39:43
one up about people that look that someone said something about walking around bad. Yeah, that’s for sure. Dan. I freak people out all the time, who is just walking down the street with his dog smiling and saying hello, or singing and dance.
Curt Anderson 39:57
Everybody say hi to people, right? But Damon as you’re going through, so again, guys, you know, we’re gonna start winding down. But if you miss anything, man, it was just it’s been pure gold. We’re just like, you know, great. How about your why, you know, like, what’s your cause? What do you you know, dedicate yourself. We’ve talked about habits, we’ve talked about making things simple, not easy. One thing about being simple and easy as like, you know, Tim Murray was talking about that humility. And, you know, like, if you could, you know, man, if you could live a life of like, just being focused on humility and gratitude, like, you know, it eliminates the strengths eliminates the worry eliminates a lack of boy, it’s just not easy, right? So you were talking about coaching, right? And so let’s go here. So we’re here together for a little coaching weekend, if you will. And so you know, iron sharpens iron Daymond I’m never the smartest guy in the room or right this minute. I am definitely like, at the low end of the totem pole. I’ve got Dr. Luis here. So Dr. Luis, let’s go. So, you know, back to humility, you know, dude, you have a PhD, you’re extremely accomplished. You know, I my respect and admiration for you off the charts. You came on my radar, you weren’t very Clark’s book, and the long game, and you have such an incredible story for your comfortable I know you’re humble guy, if you don’t mind me sharing. So you suffer, you had a brain tumor, right? And in so Damon, you know what this guy does? You know, if you get diagnosed with a brain tumor, what do you do? The day you get diagnosed in a brain tumor, you’re in Chicago. And so when you’re standing Chicago, and the Chicago Marathon is going on, you say, I’m going to run that marathon next year. That’s what you’re supposed to do when you get a break. Right? Is that? Like, who doesn’t do that? Right? Yeah, talk a little bit about like, when you were diagnosed, what inspired you to like, like, how do you even go there, dude, like, how did you think like, I’m going to run this marathon? And what did you call that? Your marathon training? You ever really? Can you share that?
Luis Velasquez 41:46
Yeah, so I got diagnosed, I went to the marathon, just to just to get my mind of the situation that I was in. Yeah. And as I was looking at him, you know, all these runners, you know, we stayed for a long time, there was a bunch of people at the very end, the end of the runners that they will come in, in, you know, like, five and a half hours, six hours. And all of them have little signs in their back saying, you know, like, brain tumor survivor, or domestic violence survivor, you know, like, what, and I was like, That inspired me, it’s like, holy crap, you know, I want to run this marathon next year. And that’s, that was the, the, the genesis of my second life, let’s put it that way. So. So when I went through, you know, the surgery when I came back, you know, I started calling my therapy or ICER, calling my recovery, my marathon training. So it wasn’t like I was trying to recover from the from the tumor. That was my marathon training. So I you know, exactly to the year I run my first marathon, and I’ve run more than 100 since then. So I’ve done that. I run I’ve run several 100 mile races. I’ve done over 12 Ironman triathlons. So I’ve done a lot of things. But now the key here is that this is something that I have learned. One thing that I realized that long story short, I survived the tumor, but neither my professional dreams, nor my marriage survive, you know, I wanted to become a, I wanted to be a professor for life, and that didn’t happen. So the one thing that I learned is that the world doesn’t belong to the people, none of the most. But the people that learn the fastest and goes back to what you mentioned, is that in order for you to have that learning mentality, sometimes you have to realize that that’s the only thing you can do another time, you know, am I what am I going to do? I even considered going to become an agreed that a Walmart to tell the truth, because I needed to find something. And so yeah, so that’s, you know, so to me, is coming that learning mentality and realize that we got to start somewhere, you know, we, you know, like I see this big intrapreneurs they didn’t think that they were going to be there, they started somewhere. You know, if you think about, you know, Mark Zuckerberg, you know, he didn’t think that he didn’t, he didn’t plan to, you know, to build this incredible company. He just wanted to connect the people in his dorm. And for me, it’s like, I just wanted to survive the, you know, the first year I wanted to recover from the marathon and then all of a sudden, you know, things start building now. So,
Curt Anderson 44:40
dude, how do you follow that? So that’s why I’m here, man. It’s like, like, did you I hope everybody just got goosebumps on that one. So yeah, that’s when you talk about resiliency. He’s just such an inspiration just such a my admiration, respect for Luis off the charts. Thank you for sharing that great Story go out and get Dorie Clark’s the long game and you can read about his story and just you know who goes to Kent? I know you don’t like that word, you know, to see her. And who goes, you know, I’m going to do marathon training, it’s not going to chemo or anything else, right? It’s just so that’s you have an incredible story with Tina Marie, you’re also a wonderful inspiration. You’ve shared a ton with our little we have a little coaching group here. Let’s talk about resiliency. If you reflect back on like your career, your family, your kids, we’ve got Jackie right here, hey, Jackie, her wife sat right on the other side. So your wonderful inspiration of resiliency, looking back on like your career, what have been some of the things that have helped you get through, like really tough times? How have you been resilient through your career?
Tina Marie St.Cyr 45:42
Thank you so much. What I believe is that we as people are resilient, and we bring that resiliency to anything we do in life and your career is just one thing. The resiliency in my life has been understanding that we grow up with certain blueprints, we think life is supposed to be a certain way, you know, for me, I was programmed in a happy way with a great family that you get married, and you, you, you, you stay in the long game with someone and that you, you know, you have your career and you get your degrees and you have your kids and all that kind of stuff. And so the blueprints are great, but when the blueprint blows up, you know, blueprint blueprint blew up with a divorce, you know, blueprint blew up with, with my kids struggling through school, in their their adolescence, and being influenced by drugs and things that you try to protect your kids from right? Blueprint blows up whenever you have a career, and then you realize this isn’t happiness. And so I became an entrepreneur, and then that’s a struggle. You know, it isn’t all you know, roses, right? You grow through all this. But resiliency is whenever you can say I do have a blueprint, and I’m aiming at that blueprint. But then when the blueprint blows up, who are you, and that’s, it’s not about the blueprint, it’s about who you are in it, and that you pull the good, you harvest the good, there’s good in every tragedy, there will be something of gold in brilliance in everything that feels like utter pain. And so if you can be that person that harvests that, and takes that end, and don’t let the bitterness of the world or the the pain of the world subdue you or hold you back or become you, you know, I witnessed this lady on the plane the other day, and I have not witnessed a person like this, it was really odd to me to be in the presence of someone who was extremely judgmental. And the things that she was saying about other people on the plane, there was a baby crying, she’s like, Oh my god, can you believe they let you bring a baby on the plane? Like I paid $600 For this ticket? Why do they let a mother bring her friends and I’m like, I’m just looking at her like, Wow, you’re really thinking this way. And then start talking about other people and, and it’s interesting because I just blessed her because I went, the bitterness of the world has she let it in. And it’s become our so resiliency, is is becoming the strength of who you are your character and letting the pain and the hardships of life strengthen you and become a better version of you, no matter what comes in your way you can surmount it you are stronger you have more fire in you and the reason why the pain is here is not because it’s going to do you and it’s because it’s growing you and it’s melting you into the steel that you are
Curt Anderson 48:36
to chop them like I know we’re so we’re kinda in a time real quick Yeah. And see any tips advice things have got you through your I think
Julia Phelan 48:45
really briefly to me it’s about learning from experiences and understanding that when you’re in the moment something can feel insurmountable you you move past it and then storing that and remembering that and then the next time you get to a similar situation remembering that yeah, this might have this might feel in the moment but I’ve actually you know Samantha’s something like that in the past I can do so again. So I think it’s just all about you can learn from those things because I don’t think that resiliency is something that is just an inherent feature and everybody I think it has to be nurtured and grown and a lot of that comes from reflecting on times when you have felt that way you have been able to get past it it wasn’t the end of the world and remembering that for the next time. So I think that because I think if you don’t do that and also I think talking about failures and mistakes and things I think when you when you normalize them and talk about them that it helps other people realize like oh, okay, I right now I’m feeling like oh my god, I’m gonna get kicked out of school or this is happening. And now I am listening to somebody else who had a similar experience and look where they are now so it can help you see that you know, the bigger world out sight of how you might feel in that moment. So I think the more we can talk about hardships and mistakes and failures and missteps is really really important.
Curt Anderson 50:11
So good. France. Yeah. Take us home brother.
Frans van Loef 50:14
Well, you know, and this is really so great for you guys say I can only add one thing to it. You know, I’ve been playing water polo at top level in my youth. And the one thing that I learned is also related with research. It’s never the last game, you can lose a very important game, but there’s always a new game again. So you never ever, it’s never the last chance you know. So that’s basically the only thing I like to add. But I also want to come back to the shelf space principle because in seven minutes from now, this room we have to remove from this room be some because someone else is coming in his room for Louis so there’s also shelf space principle example. Right? Right, removing
Curt Anderson 50:53
things. All right, so let’s close it out. So man, go back and review that. Yeah, and I get a whole week. Like it’s almost Yeah. Like I feel like I’m eating right now. So alright, we’re gonna close out Damon because we, we’ve got to run. So one last question super fast about 1520 seconds. So we’re here for Dorie Clark. Dorie Clark has been an offender on the program. She has a powerhouse. I think Wall Street best seller, Best Selling Author of multiple books, your thoughts on Dorie Clark, what are your thoughts? So we’re here for like a little coach weekend coaching session with Dorie Clark, your thoughts on Dorie Clark police?
Luis Velasquez 51:30
I think that she’s I think that she’s she’s a force to be reckoned with. And I think that she is doing a lot of work in the world that has impacted a lot of people. And I am part of that group that I think that my business wouldn’t be what it is now wouldn’t be if she what I learned from attending the seminar. Right? So that kudos to her.
Curt Anderson 51:58
Brian priceless, your thoughts real quick,
Tina Marie St.Cyr 52:00
Dory is genuine, authentic and approachable. And her success is repeatable. Meaning that you can learn from people that are here to build that success in yourself and I too wouldn’t be where I am without being part of this amazing group. So thanks, Tori, for opening up for us. Julia
Julia Phelan 52:19
oh gosh, yes, all of those things and I think just someone who speaks in in real practical terms and gives real practical advice and and it’s not Yeah, it’s just tangible and tractable and I always really appreciate that about her
Tina Marie St.Cyr 52:41
Frans van Loef 52:42
She’s extremely talented but well I like you know with one remark you can all of a sudden be five blocks down the road. I don’t know how she did is doesn’t you know, but it’s amazing.
Curt Anderson 52:52
Actually celery yeah in France came across from the Netherlands to be here so Damon we’re gonna close out and so we’ve got a couple of people have a couple of things to do here. So we’re gonna we’re gonna run so many so many takeaways, the why we’ve talked about the habits we’ve talked about, you know, breaking it down in simple steps we’ve talked about you know, what, do you pull it off your plate or what do you throw it away in your closet before you replace it with something new so please go back and hit the replay button on this. This was just so first off I got a big round of applause for our esteemed panel of just amazing people here so Damon I get it I get to soak in all this this weekend. And so thank you guys for joining us we appreciate you and just as we’d like to close out Damon just you know go out and be someone’s inspiration just like these for man is just such a blessing I think each one of you love all you guys and so Damon closes closes out brother thanks for being with us today Damon so close us out dude.
Damon Pistulka 53:50
All right. Well, thanks to all of you know, I sat down with Kurt Mike that Mike balanced yeah there’s there’s so many comments coming through here. But thanks all you for taking the time to sit with Kurt and I today and and man just sharing your thoughts because there’s so much gold in here. I get two pages of notes from this and, and just going through the things and it was resonating with the people out here. And thanks everyone for listening. We know we appreciate that you’re here. Go back and rewind this thing start from the beginning, because it’s worth it to do it. And this is a it’s been a special event for us. And I just want to say thanks for being here week in and week out and we will be back again next week. Have a great weekend everyone